Jack Benny

All posts tagged Jack Benny

Checkmate, Chekhov

Published January 28, 2012 by Kristin

Brahms’ Lullaby plays, fading into—

Elmo as "Matador"?

Bert: Good evening and welcome to this hour of “Mother Goose Children’s Theatre,” bringing you safe theatre for your bedtime stories. Which is like Elmo training to be a Matador. I’m your host, Bertolt Brahms.

 

 

In recent news, Sanford Meisner met up with the television comedian, Jack Benny, for a special two-hour interview with BBC. The interview will air in two weeks, but the following review can be found on their website.

English: Publicity photo of Jack Benny.

Jack Benny

Sanford Meisner met a miser

 

Ebeneezer Scrooge was he

 

He cast Jack Benny, counting his pennies,

 

Repeating “Bah Humbug,” for a fee.

 

 

In an attempt to bring the world of sports and theatre closer together, as Brecht would have liked, Mother Goose Children’s Theatre will soon produce our own version of The Threepenny Opera in which an entire football game will happen simultaneously. But until then: if theatre had a sport’s announcer, here are some phrases you might hear.

 

The game’s aFoote!

Chekhov and his Australian teammate, Checkmate

Aannd…Noises Off!

It’s going…it’s going…it’s Far Away!

Boy, is he ever hitting those aside lines. Nailed ‘em.

 

Capra's answer to shoplifting.

 

The retail clothing store located next to us has recently started using our advertising posters as a new way of communicating with their customers.

For example, right now their “Shoplifters will be prosecuted” sign has our “You Can’t Take It With You” sign displayed directly below it.

 

 

 

 

Finally this evening, we leave you with a sweet little lullaby for all you children out there whose fathers are actors. If he weren’t in rehearsal right now, this is what he would sing to you.

 

The Actor’s Lullaby:

 

How to study for a biology exam.

Hush, little baby, don’t say a word,

Papa’s playing Hamlet; or have you heard?

 

 

If you heard, then you must know

I auditioned for Edgar Allen Poe.

 

 

If old Poe does not pan out,

Papa’s playing Bishop in Shanley’s Doubt.

 

 

If in Doubt I seem a goof,

I’ll be trying out for David Auburn’s Proof.

 

 

And if in Proof all I do is bellow,

Then sign me up to play Othello.

 

 

Magic is like acting. Deception for a living...

And if Othello can’t be contained,

I’ll try sleight of hand with David Blaine.

 

 

If David Blaine should just seem a clown,

Then I’ll stay right here, and not go into town.

 

 

 

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